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July 28, 2008

What To Say To A Girlfriend After An Argument

Arguing between couples is normal and will happen to the best of couples. Avoiding arguments is probably not healthy and sooner or later one of you will explode. Arguments are a necessary part of any relationship because they allow you an avenue to express thoughts and opinions that you might not otherwise express. This is a way for the relationship between a man and a woman to grow and develop. You will have to make up after an argument. What you say to a girlfriend after an argument can determine how successful you will be in making up with her. Be the first one to say I'm sorry. Pretty simple right? Not always. Most of us believe that apologizing means accepting defeat; admitting that we were wrong. This isn't the case. Offering an apology can mean that you are sorry for arguing. You are sorry for causing your girlfriend any pain. Saying I'm sorry means that you want to stop arguing and start talking. Saying I'm sorry to your girlfriend can give you the upper hand after an argument because she will view you as someone that does not always think they are right. It will show her that her thoughts, opinions and feelings matter too. Tell her that you love her and you want to make things right - even if you don't believe that you are wrong. You want to keep communication open between you two. Saying these words shows her that you are willing to try to do what is necessary to keep the relationship alive. Just talk. If you find it difficult to apologize or to express loving feelings then just start talking - about anything! Silence suggests indifference (that you just don't care) OR that you are still angry. If you simply start a conversation this will at least open the door to communicating and if it feels right you can revisit the original dispute. Stay calm though. Tell her that you respect her feelings. Women are sensitive individuals. They often take arguing to a personal level and their feelings become intermingled with the facts. Express to her that you understand her feelings and that you respect her for that. If you do this be sure you have a handle on her true feelings. If you don't it could easily blow up in your face as being patronizing. Tell her that you heard what she said and you wanted to think about it for awhile. Women want to be heard. They get very frustrated when their guy can't repeat back what they said or won't respond to a question because they weren't listening. Pay attention to them when they are arguing with you. Make a conscious effort to remember their main points. You can say something like this "so you are saying (repeat back the main points). Is that right?" Then tell her you're too angry to discuss this right now. Let me take some time to think about this so I can discuss the situation more rationally. This works great. You are not blowing her off. You can even set a time to return and discuss the problem. Just make sure you use your time away to consider what she said. Learning what to say to a girlfriend after an argument can mean all the difference in how the two of you will make up, if you will make up at all. This needs to be handled correctly and following the simple advice above can make all the difference. <h1> </h1> Are you interested in learning more about what to say to your girlfriend after an argument and relationships? Click here to receive my new free ebook: What To Say Peter Harris is a health care professional and author and writes frequently about relationships.

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